Great Way To Spend a Beautiful Sunny October Afternoon!

We went for an ATV drive........

And took our chubby Beagle for a run.......

She loved it!  As I mentioned before, it's good for her brain to be able to explore.....

I was surprised to see we have Beavers living behind our house.  I was confused as to what happened to the lovely babbling brook.  I had no idea this mess of branches was a Beaver Dam......

The Beaver Dam has flooded the wooded area around the brook.....

It was a nice way to spend a sunny October afternoon.  There are many things on our "to do" list but they will be there for another day.....

'til next time!

They say a picture speaks a thousand words....

Today we went to the ZOO, I will write more about our visit later.  I have been trying to find words to describe how my heart felt the moment I saw this photo I took, but I am at a loss for words.  There's a story in those eyes......the best I can do to describe how I feel is "it makes my heart ache"......

I Think I'm On A Quest....

Recently I wrote about taking the step to attend Church.  I am trying to figure out if the quaint little country Church is for me.  As I mentioned, the Pastor is very nice and the Parish as well but it's very "old fashioned".  I have a friend who attends a more modern Church and I think I may attend to see what it's all about.

Last week they had communion again.  I didn't participate as I didn't want to stress my Son out even more than he already was that day (a long story).  Plus, I had never taken part in communion before and I didn't realize my Son could take part at age 3.  One of the ladies told me I "didn't need to be a member to take communion".  At that moment I ended up with another question whirling around in my head, along with "what are those envelopes for".  How DO I become a member?  I assumed I was a member just by attending and giving to the collection plate!  Guess not.  And my Son is finding Sunday School to be very stressful, which is the opposite of what I had hoped.  Most weeks he is the only child since most of the congregation is elderly and being the only child means there's a lot of focus on YOU!  So, that means I don't only need to find a Church right for me, I need to find a Church that's right for my Family.

My heart urged me to attend Church so I leave it up to my heart to decide which Church is right for me.  Which Church speaks to me.....time will tell.

'til next time!

Getting ready for winter....

We're busily working on our winter "to do" list, things we have put off all summer and can't put off any longer.  We are working on getting our firewood into the basement.  The humidifier is running over time to dry it out.  We have a lot of wood that still needs to be cut into furnace sized pieces.  We also need to repair our furnace.  The roof of the "firebox" has warped.  As usual, I'm frustrated that things are not made as heavy as they used to be.  This never should have happened after only a few years of use.  But, apparently, it's "normal".

Our air exchanger needs to be serviced.  Something else that had to be invented to help a new house "breathe".  Makes no sense to me but it's law you put the energy burning devices into your home to give you fresh air.  At the same time they suck the moisture from your air so you need to run humidifiers so you don't dry up!  The first year we lived in our house the moisture was usually around 28%.  They recommend 55% so we had to get humidifiers to add moisture to the air.  Makes no sense to me....

It seems there's always something to be done, it never ends.  I would love to be able to come home, set on my deck with a glass of wine and just relax.  No thoughts rushing through my brain about what needs to be done, just quiet contentment.  I'm not sure how to find "quiet contentment" yet but I'm trying to figure it out.

That brings me to this thought that's rolling around in my brain.....

Our latest flock of meat chickens will be going to butcher November 7th.  If it is up to me we will NOT be raising two separate flocks in one year.  I haven't decided which is the best time of year to raise them yet.  Earlier or later.  We had less loss earlier in the year, the days are longer and the weather is warmer.  I think the cooler damp weather has made it harder for us with this flock.  Also, the shorter days has made it harder as far as maintenance goes.  Since we both work outside the home, our schedule does not always allow us time to clean the coops during daylight hours.  Also, when they are out during the day it's often dark by the time I get home to shut them in, risking "critter" attacks.  I have been reflecting on it and weighing the "pros and cons" and I think I have decided it was easier raising the flock earlier in the season when the weather was warmer and the days were longer.

That's my random thoughts for the day!

'til next time.....

A Day Of Baking.....

Today my "sidekick" and I spent our day in the kitchen, baking goodies.....

Halloween Cut Outs (sugar cookies)......

And Soft Pretzels....

YUM!

'til next time!

Cranberries for the Freezer.....

My side kick and I spent our evening cleaning the 10 lbs of cranberries we got at the market......

I was surprised how large they are this year with beautiful red colour....

There were a lot of berries to clean so I was glad to have the help....

Lots of sorting and washing to be done....

And finally, four 8 cup bags and one 6 cup bag later, we are finished!!!....

Lots of fresh, homemade cranberry sauce in our future!

'til next time!

A Trip To Our Local Farm Market.....

Today we went to our local Farm Market.  I was in search of Fresh Cranberries and Apples........

I took this photo quickly as we were leaving.  I realize now, had I angled my camera down a bit it would have been a fantastic photo, including a bit more of the pumpkins below it......

I was surprised to see Russet Apples, one of my absolute favourite apples....

And we also got a bag of Jona Gold for work lunches and snacks.....

There's something about bins upon bins of bright orange pumpkins that scream "Welcome to Fall"....

And "Happy Halloween"!

And, even though we grew our own pumpkins my Son was also impressed by the bins of pumpkins and insisted on purchasing a "little one" for himself.....

He was devastated when we suggested giving it to his grandmother so she could make pies.  He got it out of the trunk of our car and took it to our pumpkin display. This pumpkin is not getting made into a pie any time soon.  It's actually a sugar pie pumpkin, that's why we suggested using it for pies.  Plus we have several pumpkins in our display.




The market had many scarecrow displays on the market property.  Gotta love the old tractor, and of course "grannie" in the drivers seat.

So, I got my cranberries, my apples and a turnip.......

A great trip to our Local Farm Market :)

'til next time!

This is why we work as hard as we do to grow our own food....

http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/u-s-officials-repeatedly-warned-xl-foods-about-safety-issues-1.1000314

Hey! That's my cat!

When we moved to our new house 4 years ago we had 3 cats.  One of those cats hated having a brother and a sister.  She was happy to to be an only cat.  She hissed at the others.  Less than a year after we moved she never came home.  We figured she was killed by a coyote or caught in a trap.

Millie, the missing kitty

Last year we got a Beagle puppy.  With a new puppy you're at the vet quite often.  One day I took her for a booster shot and as we were waiting at the counter a cat on the sofa caught my eye.  The people who had the cat live in our neighbourhood.  I told myself, "that can't be Millie" and went out the door.  When I got to the car I realized I forgot to have Penny's file filled out so I went back in and as I entered over heard the cat's owners telling the story of how they came to get her.

Our Beagle Puppy, Penny

Apparently the cat was "found" not very far from our house, taken in and held against her will (sorry, I'm a bit bitter).  When nobody came to this person's house to claim her they decided they would find a home for her.  So, these people took her in and when they noticed that she wanted to run away when they left her outside they built a cage on their back deck to keep her in.  So, she didn't have a chance to come back home.  From the time she was "taken in" by the first person until the day I found her at the vet she was kept inside (I say held hostage, again, still bitter).

I had contacted our local shelters, posted her picture on Facebook and we told people in our neighbourhood she was missing and they were watching for her.  I have my opinion on whether or not a certain member of the neighbourhood knew where she was but I will keep it to myself......

Keeping in mind that she hates other animals and the office was full of them, including my own Beagle puppy, she was not a happy kitty.  She was hunched up in the smallest ball she could get into, you could see the moisture on the leather sofa where she was setting.  I knew the people so when I approached her and told the people she was my cat she hissed at me, her eyes the size of quarters.  I know she was not happy about the other animals and that she doesn't hate ME.  We compared stories like how she likes to tickle your face with her whiskers and scratching the heck out of the sofa (apparently they had her declawed).

She loved me when she lived with me, it was the other animals she didn't love.  She would sleep next to me and tickle my face with her whiskers in the morning.  But her new owners have said she wasn't happy to see me.  They actually brought it up in Church last Sunday in front of everyone!  I thought that was very rude but just pointed out the other animals in the office were stressing her out and walked away from them.

Our Cat Maggie......Enjoying my shoe????!!!

They never offered her back to me.  I would have left her with them anyway because I know she would not be happy in a house with a dog, she hated the other cats so a dog would drive her over the edge for sure.  I wonder what the proper etiquette is for a catnapped cat.....should the new owner offer it back to the previous owner?  My husband thinks so and so do many other people I have discussed it with.

Penny and Our other Cat Max playing...

Had she not been taken in and never left out again she would have come back home.  I realize many of you are saying "you shouldn't have left her out to begin with" but she was adopted from Shaid Tree, a local animal shelter, she actually would run outside between your legs.  There was NO keeping her in if she wanted to get out!  Well, unless you have a cage waiting for her when she runs through the door....

I am relieved to know she is alive and well and, I assume, happy where she is.  Though I chuckle to myself when I think the hissing may have actually been because she was angry with me for letting her get captured by these people who keep her captive in their home, walk her around on a leash and take her to Church functions.  It's funny, had I gone to Church long ago I would have found her.

A Wise man used to say "everything happens for a reason".  So, I will keep that in mind and say she was meant to find a new home that would keep her safe inside and never leave her outside to roam again......

Penny and Max, playing again!  Max is her favourite cat :)

'til next time!!

oh no, a mouse!

That was my reaction when I entered our garage to get our halloween decorations.  We had bird seed and chicken food just inside the entrance and around them I saw "signs" of a mouse.  Yup, poop.

So, instead of putting up halloween decorations we cleaned up the garage and mouse proofed the bird food.

We did get the blow up halloween decoration up.

I'll keep you posted on the mouse situation.....

'til next time!

I'm Grieving As Fast As I Can!

That is the title of the book that made me realize "hey, I am normal".  It is amazing that people would even judge someone on the length of time he or she is grieving the loss of a loved one but they do.

When I found this book, I bought it.  All I needed was that title to remind me that there is no time limit to grieving.  From what I can remember it has some pretty decent information in it too.

online source

I met my current husband during the time I was grieving my late husband.  When I reflect on it I marvel at the strength he had to console me as I grieved.  How it must have felt to hold someone as they sobbed for the loss of their loved one.  He was my knight in shining armour, supporting me through everything that was crazy in my life.  And, at that time, there was a lot of craziness going on!

I wasn't looking for a new mate, in fact I had declared never to fall in love again as the pain of losing someone you love so much seemed unbearable.  I know I was the talk of the neighbourhood but held my head high as I was doing nothing wrong. I had loved and supported my late husband during our lives together from beginning to end.  I fulfilled my wifely duty.  People judge you no matter what you do.  Had I lived alone and lived the stereotype of the "lonely widow" people would have talked about that too.  You have to do what makes you happy because no matter what you do people will talk, they will judge and they won't realize what it's really like to walk a mile in your shoes until they are in the same situation.  And, even then, they may not experience grief the same way you did, they may choose to live alone for the rest of their lives.  Which brings me to a memory.....

I was at a funeral several months after my late husband passed away.  This sweet little old lady came up to me, introduced herself and expressed her sadness for my loss.  She had lost her husband when she was young as well and lived alone all those years.  She expressed what a long and lonely life it is when you lose your husband so young.  I sat there thinking......is that what's expected of me, to live the rest of my life alone?  Is that what I want?  I was already dating my current husband at that time.  Obviously, I chose NOT to live the rest of my life alone!

To this day I dream that my late husband comes back home and I have to choose between my late husband and my current family.  I can't say I remember making a decision between the two.  I do know every time I wake up I'm confused with a heavy heart.  So, those who judge and think you just move on and never have a second thought about your past are sadly mistaken.  My dreams are obvious proof it's on my mind and finds its way to the surface.

online source

I'm not writing this for pity.  I feel a need to share my experience in hopes it may help someone understand the process of learning to live again.  Remember, everyone grieves differently, everyone has different beliefs and views on what's right and wrong.  Go with your heart and do what is best for you, the one who's left behind to gather the pieces and learn to live again....

'til next time.

Is it Halloween Time? Is it Christmas Time?

These are the questions I'm hearing daily at my house.  As kids we can't wait for the holidays to come.  As Adults we dread them, they are stressful times.  What to buy for gifts is top on the stress list.  Commercialism has caused holidays to become a stressful time.  Gone are the days of appreciating an orange and some nuts in your Christmas Stocking.  A new pair of shoes or a fancy dress....Now is the time of piles of expensive gifts to lay around the house until they get donated or thrown in the garbage.

A friend had posted on Facebook "if you could go back to any time in the past what would it be".  That question could mean many things but by her response it meant to what year or decade I guess.  I would choose a simpler time, when we grew our own food, traded for what we needed and money wasn't the ruler of the universe.  I do realize it was a "rougher" time then.  They didn't have the laws to protect people that they do now and there were world wars.  I guess I think of living in a time like "Little House on the Prairie" or "Anne of Green Gables".  I think I'm an old sole stuck in 2012, longing for the days of cooking in the kitchen and caring for the children.  Seriously, I would love to be cooking all day.  I considered becoming a cook or a baker as a profession.  It's one of my passions.  And my child is my passion.  So, that would mean I'd love my job, right?

But, daydreaming time is over, back to reality.  Time to load the dishwasher, turn off the internet and TV and head to bed.  2012 style :)

Goodnight!

Finding Peace.....good for the brain

This is not a post about religion, it's a post about finding Peace which, for me, has recently included attending Church.  It's something I like to call "good for the brain".  Where I'm not focused on anything but what's going on in that moment.  It is my opinion and my opinion only.  I'm not saying I'm right, it's just something I'm drawing from my heart and from my past and current life experiences.....

To get you to where I am now, I feel I have to fill you in on a bit of my past.....

I have been married twice, not sure if I have ever posted this in past posts, my previous husband passed away in 2006 of Testicular Cancer.  He was only 36, I was only 32.  When I got married 'the first time' I was 24, the wedding was very small and personal.  Family only, a nice dinner with just immediate family.  But it was very important to me that the wedding was in a Church.  It just seemed right to me.  We considered an outdoor wedding but my heart longed for the old fashioned Church wedding.  So, that's what we had.  There's just something about the ceremony that makes it feel special, important, complete.  Again, this is only my opinion, what I feel in MY heart.

In 2008 I remarried.  Yes, "moved on" as some would say.  I hate that expression as you never "move on".  I believe the person who has passed away will always be a part of your life.  They have helped make you who you are today.  There's always an empty place in your heart that was filled by the love they gave you.  You learn to live again.....

When I remarried it was again important for me to have a "Church wedding".  Since we both love to fish and have a fishing lure company, my Fiance mentioned a wedding on the Beach, on an Island, on a boat, on a wharf, all very Romantic ideas but none held the Romance or meaning of a Church wedding in my heart.

We did have our photos taken at a beach near our home, we enjoy going to that Beach every year on our Wedding Anniversary....

This time it was bigger.  This was the first time my current husband got married so we had family and friends, a brides maid and a best man, a flower girl and ring barer.  Much bigger than my first wedding.  We had a good sized reception with a DJ.....  Sorry, I'm getting a bit off track!  Back to the point....the day we got married was the last time I was in a church for a few years, well other than a funeral or two maybe.  Not that the church wasn't on my mind......

From the time I got married the first time in 1998 I wanted to attend Church, and probably before that.  The Church we married in was at the beginning of our road and every single time I drove past it I thought about attending that Sundays service.  I never did.  Shortly after my second husband and I married we moved.  The Church we married in is also visible from the road I travel every day.  And, I always think the same thing when I drive by, I should attend service this Sunday.

I am proud to say I finally did it, I've started attending Church.  It's been a little crazy since my Son has also started Sunday school and I have to try to be at Church and Sunday school at the same time.  But it wouldn't be my life if it weren't a bit crazy, even attending Church is complicated!  It's an "old fashioned" Church.  Very small and quaint.

This Sunday my husband graciously went with us so I could attend Church while he took our Son to Sunday school.  It was the first full service I got to attend, by myself.  It was peaceful, "good for my brain".  Even though I was nervous about finding the hymns, about what the envelope and pencil was for in front of me (whether I put my offerings directly in the plate or in the envelope) and realized I forgot to give my son his donation, I still found it peaceful.  It was Communion Day, I have never witnessed Communion.  So, once the "Giving of Thanks" was finished, I quietly exited to attend the final few minutes of Sunday School and give my Son his donation.  So, I still didn't witness Communion.

I'm not sure where my desire to attend Church comes from.  My family never attended Church when I was a child. I "quite" Sunday school when I was 6 if I remember correctly.  Maybe it's "in my blood".  My mother speaks of walking to Church as a child and expresses a desire to go to Church herself.  She is considering attending with me, which would be nice.

Walking into the Church has been a bit "weird" for lack of a better word.  I feel as if I'm imposing.  I don't see it as "my place" yet.  I see it as belonging to those who have attended those previous 135 years.  I have only attended a few services.  The Parish is very welcoming, the Pastor is very kind and you can tell he and his wife are very caring people.  It's amusing to me that the members of the Parish are actually just realizing "who I am".  I moved back to my "home place" 4 years ago.  This Sunday I got many comments stating they didn't realize who I was.  Maybe leaving before Communion made me the talk of the Parish that morning ha ha!  

I guess I will learn as time goes on.  What the envelope is for, the hymns, how Communion works.  But as I learn I know I will take comfort in the words of Pastor Ben and the friendship of the Parish.  I am glad I finally followed my heart and walked through the doors of that quaint little Church.

So, there you have it, with this post you received a bit of my complicated life history and shared in a new venture I'm experiencing.  When my late husband passed away, a friend of mine suggested I write a book.  As I write and reread this post I realize I still have much to say about my experience dealing with my late husbands death.  I may write another post or two some day and hopefully my words will help someone else who is grieving.  I could say so much more right now but I will leave it for another time. This post is not about grieving my late husband, it's about my newest journey, walking through the doors of the little community Church.


'til next time!!

A Wonderful Thanksgiving Day!

Happy Thanksgiving!

We spent the weekend doing some decorating.  I recycled some scarecrows I had in our garage and my son and I transplanted the marigolds from my vegetable garden into containers to add some colour.

The colder temperatures mean it's time to gather the firewood!

As I wandered about our property this morning, enjoying the beautiful Fall day, I snapped a few pictures of things that seemed to call out to me....

The old hay raker that belonged to my grandfather.  I remember them mowing, raking and forking the hay into the hay barn.  The hot summer days, hay seed sticking to the sweat as they forked the hay on the wagon and then into the hay barn.  Our job, the kids, was to "stomp" the hay down.  Or we were made to think it was our job, now that I'm a parent I wonder if it was just their way to keep us in one place so they knew where we were and what we were up to as they worked.

My Son's wagon, waiting patiently for him to return from gathering wood.  He loves to load this wagon with wood pieces and pull it around the yard.

We decided all work and no play doesn't a happy family make so we went for a short drive on our ATVs and took our Beagle for some exercise.

This is the first time we took her with us.  She was shaking like a leaf when I put the bell on her collar (the bell is so we can hear where she is in the woods).  I think she thought she was going to the vet because she stood by the car door.  We had to lead her by leash across her invisible fence boundary which she has great respect for.  It was a great run, she enjoyed it a lot.  Her tail was in the air the whole time, a happy Beagle.  It was good for her brain to get chance to sniff around the woods and get some exercise outside of her circular boundary in our yard.  My husband was concerned she would not stay with us, my intuition told me she wouldn't go far.  I was right.  If she got distracted by a scent it wasn't long she would come racing up behind us.  She really is a good dog.  HOWEVER, when we got home we did not make plans as to how to get her back to her boundary.  My husband was ahead and left her and I behind.  This was the first time she strayed and I couldn't find her.  Shortly after shutting my ATV off we saw her racing across our back field, to the chicken coop.  Yes, she had decided the ATV run was just a warm up for doing some chicken chasing.  We spent quite a bit of time chasing her through the bushes, trying to get the chickens to safety and catch her.  Finally, I hid behind some fencing by the meat bird run and jumped out and grabbed her as she ran past me.  She was hanging around the meat bird run as we had all the other birds closed up in the coop.  She could see the meat birds but couldn't get to them.  I am surprised she didn't see me behind the fencing but I caught her in the end.  A shame the day had to end with a Beagle Chase but lesson learned for next time.  Leash her before coming near the yard OR don't leave the birds out if we're taking her past her boundary.  Unfortunately I didn't take my camera with on our little run.  I saw so many beautiful photo opportunities, Penny in the woods, beautiful burgundy coloured leaves, an old car grill with a weathered brush pile next to it......all pictures are held in my memory, for only me to see.

We ended the day with a delicious meal.  Roast home grown chicken, carrots, dressing and mashed potato and gravy.  Oh, and cranberry sauce.  And only one little mishap when I put hot pan drippings in my gravy shaker and the cover blew off.  I was covered in gravy thickener, so was my kitchen floor and kitchen cabinets!  The dog had a good start on cleaning the floor, Ron wiped off the cabinets and kitchen window while I cleaned up myself.

I hope you all had a fantastic Thanksgiving Day.  Doing whatever it is you enjoy most!

'til next time!

What's going to be on your Thanksgiving table?

That is what is on  my mind today.

We have a freezer full of delicious home grown chicken, but my heart is leaning towards the traditional Thanksgiving Bird, the turkey.  Though I find it hard to justify purchasing a commercial grown turkey when, again, we have a freezer full of delicious home grown chicken the size of a turkey!  So I think I will select the biggest chicken we have and pretend it's a turkey. ha ha.

As far as sides go, stuffing is a must.  Not sure if I will stuff the chicken, a.k.a turkey, or just do a dressing on the side.  Then there's the decision as to whether to have Acorn or Butternut squash.  I'm leaning towards Acorn, I've had Butternut quite a few time this past week or so.  And I would like to use one of my Butternut to make a comforting soup, so I have to ration them a bit.  And I think I will steam some peas or mixed vegetables for added flavour and colour.  And, without a doubt there has to be mashed potato and gravy.  The only vegetable my husband will eat, potato.  sigh....

Home made cranberry sauce is a must!

And what about dessert?  Pumpkin pie?  Squash pie?  Apple pie?  I am thinking Apple pie since we have a 20lb bag of apples just begging to be made into a delicious pie.

What's going to be on your Thanksgiving Table this year? I hope it will be bountiful and delicious!  Everything your heart and tummy desires.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Pumpkin Harvest....

We harvested our few pumpkins and squash on the weekend.

Sadly some of the Butternut squash cracked....

Going for another load...

Sadly, the Acorn squash were the choice for a rodent.  It ruined every single Acorn squash in the garden....

The pumpkins look great, this one's my favourite!  Perfect shape for carving!

Happy Harvesting Everyone!